Brenda Eckstein International

Strategy, Leadership, Integral Coaching and Communication consulting

How to streamline your life

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Many of us are burdened, both in our work and private lives, by the excess baggage that we carry around with us. But our blind spots may cause us to be oblivious to the physical and emotional excesses that have become part of us. There are ways of streamlining our lives through regularly reviewing our personal resources, services and the way we operate. And we need to be motivated to take the necessary action on our findings.

One of my favourite stories relating to this topic is told by Mark Eppler in ‘Management Mess-ups: 57 pitfalls you can avoid (and stories of those who didn’t)’. He describes Mess-up No 19 as ‘failure to ‘scrape the barnacles’ by conducting frequent self-appraisals and making the needed adjustments.’ How often do we fall into this trap?

Early one morning the author was walking along the beach in Ireland. In the distance he saw the fisherman on the beach rubbing their up-side down boats. He was concerned as the weather was good and they should have been out fishing. Feeling curious, he went over and spoke to them and was told that they were ‘scraping away the barnacles’. It still didn’t make sense as to him it seemed that they were wasting a day when they could have been out fishing and thus making money.

They explained that barnacles, those tiny little mollusks that attach themselves to rocks, wood and anything else under seawater, although starting off very small, would grow over time making the fishermen’s boats heavier and heavier. They estimated that this could cost them up to 40% extra in fuel and make the boats far less maneuverable.

Isn’t that a great metaphor for what happens in our lives? Things creep up on us. We become complacent. Whether emotionally or physically we use more resources, more energy in order to achieve our goals. We are less agile and thus less able to quickly and easily respond to change in the form of pivoting. Being able to recognise opportunities and optimise by taking immediate action is important in our lives, particularly during this current pandemic.

When mentoring clients or training groups, I often encourage them to ‘develop an attitude of positive discontent’. This concept often emerges in my role as an executive coach, too. What do we mean by that phrase? And how do we go about determining whether aspects of our business or private lives are the best that they can be?

I recommend scheduling a day every 3 or 6 months when you carefully scrutinise all your resources, your product, your service, the way you operate. In fact, you need to look at every aspect of your personal and or business life and check that each is serving you well. Cut down on excesses. Find new ways of improving productivity and enhancing your ‘way of being’. For each element, if it is the best it can be, then there is no need to take action now. However, at the next audit, you need to consider it again. If it isn’t (the best it can be), put this in your action plan with definite steps in order to implement and sustain the desired improvement.

Take action! By using less fuel we will be making better use of our resources, have more energy and there will be less wastage. We will be more agile so that we can recognise and optimise opportunities. Our productivity and way of being will be enhanced and we are more likely to have a sense of flourishing.

The video version of this story, How to streamline your life may be seen on our website.

For more information on executive coaching, leadership development or training, you are welcome to visit our website – www.strategy-leadership.com or contact brenda@strategy-leadership.com

Travellers’ tips for the journey

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I smiled as I read Trip Advisor’s article on ‘Travellers’ Top Tips to Pack Smart’.  Every one of these ideas could be considered as a metaphor for preparing ourselves for an optimal journey through the next phase of our lives, whether we are referring to next year or the rest of our lives.

How might this apply to our lives?
Many of us have lives that are far too cluttered and are carrying excess baggage whether physically or emotionally. These weigh us down and deplete our energy. How do we trim down, keep just what is useful and helping us to lead better lives? And how do we carefully choose those new aspects that are fun and create adventure? Our cups soon start to overflow if we just keep adding. The new items spill out over the top. The process involves firstly clearing out excess. Then create space by stopping certain activities while being cognisant of continuing what is important and serving a purpose.

This tip also implies having spare resources to spend. As the facilitator of personal strategy, I find that when we talk of resources, individuals tend to think primarily in terms of financial resources. I assign an exercise which involves carefully considering various resources such as knowledge and access to information, skills, qualifications, personal branding, the use of personal attributes (character strengths, values, touchstones etc.), executive coaching, energy, people, networks and relationships, time, technology, transport, accommodation and many more resources.

I believe there is a parallel between the way we build, store and use the resources at our disposal and the way we can consciously build, store and use our energy in the best possible way.

How might this apply to our lives?
Not only is life moving at an accelerated pace but we are bombarded by more and more stimuli. This means that we need to take active steps to filter out what is not necessary at that time. How can we be mindful, focussed and living in the moment if we are distracted and overwhelmed by all that is going on around us? How do we selectively eliminate or reduce the effect of certain stimuli which may be unnecessary or negative at that time? We need rest so a metaphorical sleepmask could be very helpful in enabling us to filter out interfering stimuli relating to sight. The earmuffs could help us avoid hearing harassment and unnecessary sounds which are intruding on our presence.

The sleep mask and earplugs are useful in keeping out influences and stimuli which have a negative influence on our current ‘way of being’.

How might this apply to our lives?
Think of a suitcase as being the metaphor for the container of our lives.

We need to use our resources effectively and efficiently. To me, space is a resource and without space we can’t recognise or optimise opportunities.

But our lives are usually already very full. So how can we be more effective in packaging whatever we are fitting into our lives? How do we use least time and energy yet enhance the experience of whatever we do? How do we experiment in for example rolling rather than folding. How do we use disruption to our advantage? In my coaching programmes we introduce practices helping clients create space so that they can reflect productively or plan the future.

So what I’m saying here is ‘yes, we do need to fill up the gaps’ (like those when packing shoes) in a meaningful way. However, that will help to create space that we can use for productive purposes.

How might this apply to our lives?
We need to be more selective and discover items that have multiplicity of purpose. This again often requires a disruption to the way we have always unconsciously done things. How can we explore new ways of performing even the most mundane processes in our lives? In which ways can we find new uses for our existing items? For example, if I go to gym very early in the mornings, I am more likely to be able to watch sunrise on the way, take my dogs with me (they stay in the car so I can’t take them when it is too hot) and have my exercise completed before I start my workday. So there are many benefits.

How might this apply to our lives?
Often we feel overwhelmed because there is so much we need to do. Clustering similar activities or items could help us to feel more organised. Creating boundaries around them is also an important aspect of feeling ‘in control’. Some of us are better at doing this than others. What is within those boundaries is as important as what is not within, what is outside. We also need to make sure that the container is the right size and shape. And once we have become good at establishing those boundaries, how do we transfer that skill to other aspects of our lives?

How might this apply to our lives?
In order to focus on what is important on life’s journey or even parts of it, we need to remain focussed on what is important to us. It is easy to be distracted, especially when we are out of routine, in a strange place or embarking on a new journey.

Too often we are lulled into acceptance instead of choosing what is best for us. It is right for the masses, it isn’t necessarily right for us. Being pro-active and considering our options enables us to be more in tune with our own ‘way of being’.

How might this apply to our lives?
We spend our lives packing and unpacking. And it is good that we do that. However, reflecting on our actions helps us to create meaning. Through unpacking the experience and reflecting on it we can extract the essence, a simple lesson. And then we need to ask ourselves: How can I use this lesson in other fields in my life? What action should I take?

How might this apply to our lives?
The old adage, ‘sharing is caring’ applies in many aspects of our lives. Teamwork is important in so many areas. And here we can be referring to our partners, families or immediately team (both in our private or business lives). Or we could apply this to our broader network of relationships. We often forget the value of what others can add through sharing our space.

How might this apply to our lives?
In life we need energy for so many of our heart, head, spiritual, networking and other functions. Without it, action might be impeded. Connection to others gives us access to information, and assistance. This support enables us to use our own energy wisely.

How might this apply to our lives?
Stopping to record enables us to collect our thoughts and make the best possible use of information. Taking a photograph enables us to capture the moment and has great significance. In coaching programmes, where relevant, I often weave in a practice of daily pausing to take a photograph.

Use this tips in order to prepare yourself for a more successful life’s journey and you will flourish.

For more information on executive coaching, keynote speaking or training you are welcome to contact me - Phone: +27 33 3425432, Mobile: + 27 82 4993311, e-mail: brenda@146.66.90.172

101: Using resources creatively

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The ‘wisdom of the elders’ has a huge impact on our lives and we need to recognise and honour the gifts that are passed down through generations.  There is often ‘tacit knowledge’, information or ‘know how’ that cannot easily be articulated.  It is absorbed through interaction within positive relationships.

December 25 2012, Mavis on her 91st birthday with partner Norris.

December 25 2012, Mavis on her 91st birthday with partner Norris.

Let me give you an example:

My mother’s family had little money but an abundance of love.  She grew up being unaccustomed to wearing shoes as it wasn’t necessary on the farm – and her parents couldn’t easily afford shoes for the children.  They went to school by horse-and-trap and if it rained too hard, they couldn’t cross the drifts, so had to stay at home.  That generation also weathered ‘the great depression’ and ‘the war years’ so they were accustomed to ‘doing without’.  They saved and made use of what they had.  And this influenced their lives enormously and continues to do so.  In addition, fostering positive attitudes enabled them to be creative and meet the challenges. 

Let’s skip to the next generation:  When I was a child my mother owned and ran a ‘tea-room’ and sold fruit and vegetables.  The leftover fruit was carefully combined and cut into fruit salad which was sold to shoppers later in the day.  The parts of vegetables that couldn’t be sold were put into the huge soup cauldron, combined with meat bones and became delicious, nutritious soup.  On cold, dark winter mornings, my mother opened the shop at 6am and workers on their way to the 3 local factories brought in their empty ‘jam tins’ which she filled with her hot soup, charging them only a pittance.  

Even now that she is 91 years of age, she constantly inspires me with her ingenuity and positive attitude.  This year she gave beautifully wrapped Christmas gifts and from a distance I marvelled at how much effort she had gone to.  But, when I came closer, I was even more surprised. 

blog101a

Have a careful look:  she has used the slightly shiny advertising pages from the newspaper for wrapping.  You’ll see the picture of ‘Koo’ brand peaches, cooking oil and dried beans.  The ‘ribbon’ was ‘danger tape’ which had served its purpose on the pavement and had been left lying in the gutter.  Of course she washed it and went to the trouble of making a range of different beautiful bows.  (When I complimented her she responded ‘and it was such fun!’)

Below is an example of another bow:

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Now in this current era, for many there is an ‘overabundance’ of material items.  Through habit, some have become unnecessarily extravagant and wasteful. Complacency often destroys our ability to recognise, value and use our potential resources in the best possible way.  So, we need to make a conscious effort to deal with all our resources more effectively. 

From the story above there are many lessons to be learned.  And these are significant in our personal, business, professional, organisational and community lives.  Let’s reflect on a few questions: 

  • How can we use our resources more wisely? 
  • How can we be more creative in looking for new ways of using ‘old things’?
  • In which ways can we be less wasteful and less extravagant?
  • And how can we tap into ‘the wisdom of the elders’ in more deliberate and constructive ways? 

For more information on our ‘executive coaching or ‘leadership development’ please contact Brenda on +27 82 4993311 or +27 33 3425432 – email brenda@146.66.90.172 or www.strategy-leadership.com

Emptying the cupboard: the story and the questions

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There is a story behind ‘everything’ and we need to ‘look for the lesson’.  Then we need to plan.  But a plan without action remains a plan.  Implementation is necessary.  And then we need to have a process where we regularly ‘pause’ and consider the reality of the current status of the situation. 

Let me tell you a story about my favourite cupboard.  Today I used the ‘barnacle’ principle to de-clutter.  (You may wish to refer back to my article, ‘Excess Baggage’ on November 8 2012).  My approach was that anything that did not fit neatly into the storage cupboard in an organised, tidy manner needed to go to the garbage bin. 

Let’s go through the process:

1.  First we ‘unpacked’ the contents so that we would have an empty container. Nothing remained.

2.  Then we took the contents to a different room and spread out everything which meant that we were looking at it from a new angle.  I couldn’t believe how much had accumulated through being randomly added in the year since we last had a ‘spring-clean’.  There certainly was a great amount of ‘excess baggage’. 

3.  Then we could start reorganising, putting similar items together.  We looked for patterns.  Which were the items that served a similar purpose?  How could we maximise the use of each resource?  In which areas did we have ‘enough’?  What would it be like if we didn’t have each item?  Where were there excesses?   What was missing?  Which were the items of least value or usefulness to us?

4.  We decided what we were keeping and which we no longer needed.

5.  The next step was to pack those items that had value to us into the cupboard in an organised manner.

6.  We disposed of the rest, either by giving away or placing in the ‘recycle’ bin.

So, what are the direct benefits of this annual exercise?  Firstly, the cupboard is more ‘user-friendly’ again. The doors shut properly.  There is no longer an ‘avalanche’ of items pouring out as I open the door!  Items stay in their correct places.  It is a pleasure to go to the cupboard and find exactly what I want in the minimum amount of time.  In addition, the usefulness of each item is multiplied. Thus, the cupboard itself becomes more functional. 

Going back to the story of ‘scraping away the barnacles’, two of the major effects of that ‘pause’ once a year when the fishermen scraped their boats was that the boats used far less fuel to reach the fishing areas and secondly, the boats were much more manoeuvrable. 

The story of my cupboard and that of ‘scraping away the barnacles’ have a similar theme and both are metaphors for what may be happening in our lives.  Unless we pause to reassess and look for patterns, we may not understand the current status.   This precedes ‘getting rid of excess baggage’.  

Some of the questions you may wish to ask yourself are:

  • Which areas of your professional or private lives need to be de-cluttered?  Where do you have ‘excess baggage’ and this could be either physical or emotional ‘baggage’.
  • When are you going to ‘unpack’ that area?
  • How can you ‘empty the contents’ so that you create a ‘space’?
  • What can you do to enable you to ‘spread out the contents’?
  • What criteria can you use to ‘resort’?
  • How are you going to go about recognising patterns?
  • How do you view through a different filter?
  • How are you going to dispose of all those items that no longer ‘fit into the cupboard’?
  • How can you become more agile and more flexible?
  • How can you use fewer resources to achieve your goals?

In the story of our lives there needs to be punctuation.  We need to ‘stop’, before we decide to ‘start’ or ‘continue’.  Planning regular ‘pauses’ enables us to ‘correct’ and then‘re-generate’.  

For more information on our facilitation of ‘leadership development’ or ‘executive coaching’ please contact me - brenda@146.66.90.172, Phone: +27 33 3425432, Mobile: + 27 82 4993311.

Personal Resources

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When facilitating ‘personal strategy’ during ‘leadership development’ sessions or developing a ‘three year vision’ during ‘networking tactics’ sessions, I like to set the scene by asking participants to imagine themselves three-years hence.  Sometimes we prefer to take a one-year time frame.  Life moves fast! 

We start by considering ‘personal resources’.  This helps to focus the participant’s thinking and ‘ground’ the development of our vision statement.  Although I provided a similar list in an article in October 2011, I am sharing the updated questions I developed for a client yesterday.  Please let me know if you think of other questions I should include.  Thank you!  Please imagine what you’d like your life to look like in three years time and answer the questions below which relate to personal resources:

Resources 

Financial 

What capital do you wish to have accumulated?

What are you earning? 

What income are you generating on a regular basis? 

How are you doing this?  

How have you invested your money?

Employment 

Where are you working? 

What are you doing? 

What opportunities are there for future growth? 

And how are you going to achieve this?

Human 

Which groups of people or individuals are significant in: 

  • your personal life? 
  • your business life?
  • your community life?

Time 

How are you allocating your time in:

  • Your personal life?
  • Your business?
  • Your community life?

Energy 

How are you building your personal energy? 

How are you conserving it? 

How are you allocating or spending it?  

Accommodation 

Where are you living?  Describe.

Knowledge and qualifications 

How have you progressed in the last three years? 

What new skills have you acquired? 

What new qualifications have you achieved? 

What are your goals for the next period?

Transport 

What daily means of transport do you have or use?

Brand 

Your personal brand is a resource. 

How have you built it?

How are you promoting it?

Coaching 

Yes, coaching is a resource. 

What have you done to make sure that you are exposed to the right coaching for you? 

How are you benefitting?

Network 

Your personal network is a powerful resource. 

What are you doing to build and maintain relationships? 

How are you improving your skills as a networker?

What are you doing to expand your network in a meaningful way?

Technology 

How ‘up to date’ are you? 

Can you effectively incorporate the latest relevant and available technology where beneficial?

Other  

Please add your own questions here.

If you’d like to know more about our facilitation of leadership development, personal strategy, networking tactics, integral coaching or any of our other services, you are welcome to contact me - Phone: +27 33 3425432, Mobile: + 27 82 4993311, brenda@146.66.90.172.