Brenda Eckstein International

Strategy, Leadership, Integral Coaching and Communication consulting

Letter to Tom

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Dear Tom, 

Since I first met you at the NSAA Convention in Melbourne a few years ago, I have marveled at the way in which you have built up the Beechworth Bakery and other businesses. Thank you for being such a wonderful inspiration.  

I love reading your stories of how at the age of 6 years you decided that you had to be able to buy your own mattress.  You immediately started working towards your goal which you achieved through being a hardworking entrepreneur.  By then you knew how to succeed and have continued to build on that.  Yes, we need to have purpose.  And you have an excellent ability to combine purpose with your passion and thus achieve excellent outcomes. 

I thought you’d be fascinated by this picture below:

In this photo taken yesterday in Pietermaritzburg, Kwa-Zulu Natal, Republic of South Africa, you’ll see: 

  • Nathi Mbhele, Save Hyper Bakery Manager
  • Rashaad Solomon, Manager, Save Hyper
  • Devan Moodley, Group Bakery Manager

They are talking to a group of Cordwalles Primary children and their teachers.  This was part of an interactive workshop. 

I’m sure you are already saying ‘I know where they got that idea’.  And yes, you do.  Your examples from Beechworth Bakery had a huge impact on the management team and staff and we are very grateful for that.   During a ‘Sustainable Customer Service Strategy’ programme which I’m running with Save Hyper at present, spanning a period of 6 weeks, I showed them your video and they decided to follow your example of encouraging children to come into the bakery.  

The group of children and teachers spent three hours at the bakery yesterday.  As Rashaad Solomon, General Manager said, ‘This was a branding exercise and way of connecting to future customers.’  He also said:  ‘I was so touched seeing the excitement and enthusiasm on the kiddie’s faces.’   After a productive and exciting morning, the children each took home a cupcake and loaf of bread.  And as you mention in the video, Tom, those children are going to be reluctant to let their parents buy bread elsewhere! 

So let’s look at just a few of the lessons we are learning through this example: 

  1. Show appreciation. Our theme this week is ‘Show appreciation’ and all 300 staff have been asked to actively and sincerely tell customers that they appreciate them and the business they bring.  They are working on this principle both at work and in their home situations.  Each participant needs to apply the principle and ‘catch some-one doing something right’ in relation to showing appreciation.  Next week staff need to come with examples of what they have seen and done during the last week.  So, Tom, I’m setting the example by telling you how much I appreciate your ‘way of being’.  The photo shows a concrete example of where you have impacted positively on others and I’m grateful to you.
  2. Passion fuels positive action. Your passion and actions are aligned.  You have always worked incredibly hard in order to achieve your goals.  The Save Hyper team is doing exactly that. They are following a path that generates enthusiasm.  No wonderful they are the current Pietermaritzburg Chamber of Business (PCB) ‘Business of the Year’. 
  3. Having fun while we learn energises and this motivates us in all fields. In your video, your sense of fun is infectious.  Save Hyper picked up on this and the staff, children, teachers and bystanders all had a great time yesterday.
  4. By building relationships we can recognise and optimise opportunities. There is a sense of trust and people take risks more easily where there are positive relationships.  Yesterday’s session was the first the team at Save Hyper had held.  Yet, together they could experiment and be pioneers in this field.
  5. We need to share our experiences and the ripple effect goes way beyond our boundaries. I shared your examples and showed your video to the management and staff of Save Hyper.  Thus 300 people enthused over your positive approach and wonderful ideas.  So, a promotional activity demonstrated by you in Victoria, Australia was repeated in KwaZulu-Natal, Republic of South Africa.  And the outcomes were positive.
  6. It is important to recognise opportunities to promote our brands. The children each left with their cupcakes in the beautiful magenta and lime branded Save Hyper boxes. So there was follow-through from the experience and this cemented the memories.  They had something tangible to take home as a reminder.
  7. Capitalise on the culture of the organisation. Save Hype is a nice place to be.  The experience is great.  And this reflects directly back on the way the Beechworth Bakery works.  There is a similar culture of caring for each other and caring for our customers.
  8. Tom, as you know, one of my passions is networking. This involves connecting people with people, people with opportunities and people with information.  So, by sustaining our relationship over the years, I was able to be the catalyst in indirectly connecting the Save Hyper team with you and your work.  This enabled them to see opportunities.  And then this helped to release their energy and creativity.  And of course, there was a lot of hard work involved, too.

Tom, no geographic boundary can contain your enthusiasm.  Your influence has overflowed and we are reaping the benefits here in South Africa.  I do hope it won’t be long before you visit again?  I’ll be in Sydney in November and perhaps I can ‘catch up’ with you and Christine then?

Warm wishes and thanks,
Brenda

Successful women

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Have you read ‘Lean In:  women, work, and the will to lead’ by Sheryl Sandberg, COO of Facebook?  It has stirred up some challenging responses from both men and women.  One of my clients gave me a copy and reading it has inspired me to observe certain leadership behaviour patterns in others and in me. 

This topic was the inspiration behind conversation at a recent lunch at my favourite coffee shop, Aubergine to which I had invited seven of my women friends. It is amazing what happens when you gather around a table eight intelligent, diverse women who don’t know each other, nor who have any agenda (either hidden or declared!).  Thank you to Cheryne, Des, Hannah, May, Pam, Pranitha and Rosie for sharing their responses and for their quality input into our conversations.  

L-R: Pranitha Pather, Rosie Chite, and May Bingham.

Success 

First, I asked them to write their ‘gut’ response in defining or describing ‘success’.   The answers were fascinating and included: 

  • Independence, guidance and the ability to make a difference in other’s lives; happiness at work and at home but continuously involved in the learning process.
  • Happiness in the ‘in-between’ moments; loving the sound of the alarm in the mornings; striving for excellence; satisfaction with a job well done; making a difference; mentoring; confident in own abilities   I matter: what I do matters.
  • Balance implying appropriateness for individuals in time management, which will differ from person to person, under different conditions.
  • Love what you do; see others growing through you and the ability to seeing and live the outcomes to your actions; and to be able to let go and let others go.
  • Enjoy and find your passion.
  • Learn from failure and be able to move on.

Characteristics of a successful woman

Next they were asked to list ten characteristics of a successful woman.  I have divided their responses into four groups or domains:

D1

  • Honesty and integrity – ethics and values.
  • Courage.
  • Self-Belief.
  • Humility.
  • High standards – aim at excellence.
  • Kind, empathetic, loving.
  • Positive attitudes - enjoy hard work – don’t see it as ‘work’.
  • Sense of humour.
  • Inner strength.
  • Enthusiasm.
  • Passion for ‘work’.
  • Joy.
  • Patience.
  • Authenticity and not having to prove oneself by being a ‘superwoman’.

D2

  • Confident and prepared to take a chance.
  • Resilient.
  • Flexible, adaptive.
  • Strong.
  • Powerful.
  • Have an opinion and be able to share and convince others.
  • Develop and grow people to see the change and make them happy.
  • Listening openly to others for interest – not just for networking.
  • Learning always – from family, peers, workers and network.
  • Stable, grounded and rock-like.
  • Curiosity – ask questions – and then really listen to the answers.
  • Open minded – and also know when to close it!
  • Fit - physically and emotionally.
  • Motivated.
  • Articulate for accurate communication.
  • Have the ability to ‘go against the flow’.
  • Leadership.

D3 

  • Emotionally intelligent.
  • Tolerance but with clear boundaries.
  • Non- discriminative – research and know before taking a decision.
  • Generosity.
  • Quick to praise and do this publicly.
  • Slow to criticise and do this privately.
  • Community spirit.
  • Helpful.
  • Empowered.

D4

  • Visionary.
  • Determination in achieving goals.
  • Attention to career development and success.
  • Chosen balance between work and family.
  • Faith in something more powerful than you.
  • Balance – whatever that means to each individual.
  • Knowledge.
  • Ability to separate life roles.

As South African women, how can we ‘lean in’ more?

This was the third and final question.  

We need to:

  • Develop the competence to know what to do;
  • Stop seeing each other as competition;
  • Engage with women from all communities, particularly in business;
  • Mentor, encourage, inspire and work with everyone;
  • Support each other – males and females;
  • Be sensitive to the process of withdrawing when necessary, and then  returning if necessary;
  • Share in forums and groups for quality conversations;
  • Participate and not just observe;
  • Lose the fear;
  • Be aware – have a finger on the pulse of situations;
  • Be postmodern – well-informed;
  • Be in the present;
  • Network;
  • Use the voice we have;
  • Support and motivate.

This exercise is not intended as an academic survey but simply the spontaneous answers written individually by a group of eight diverse women; the exercise took less than ten minutes.  Quality conversation and the sharing of ideas, the purpose of the meeting was achieved. A greater understanding of each other and of the way different people view the world was the outcome.  Great insights were gained and the conversations continued naturally and informally after the event.  This is a great way to build relationships and to network. 

Two years ago, under similar circumstances, I asked a group of women to list the characteristics of a successful woman.  Their answers are outlines in an article entitled, ‘Success is…’. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we could all show these characteristics and feel successful?  Through Executive Coaching, whether you are a woman or a man, you can shift towards a better ‘way of being’.  This will enhance all aspects of your life. 

For more information on Executive Coaching, training in networking and communication skills or the other services offered by Brenda Eckstein International, please contact brenda@146.66.90.172 or phone +27 82 4993311.

Personal networking – a different perspective

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‘Personal networking as a Business Tool’ is the title of a workshop I presented recently for the Durban Chamber of Commerce and Industry.  This session emphasized the importance of building positive relationships which, in turn, help us to become the person of choice, firm of choice or business of choice.  

Positive relationships also generate an ‘absence of malice’.  When things go wrong, as they often do in business, within an existing positive relationship, we are more likely to be given the benefit of the doubt.  So while acknowledging the importance of social media, the focus of this workshop was on the benefits of building positive relationships.

L-R: Iqbal Sheik, Harold Sampson, Vidhaan Deolal and Zanele Nzaza.

 In summary, the consolidation on some of their ideas on the benefits of personal networking are: 

  1. Personal networking is beneficial within groups and organisations and externally as well.  We need to carefully identify where we play roles and who our stakeholders are.  In other words, whom do we serve?  And which entities or people have power over our organisations or over us?  The benefits of fostering those relationships are enormous.
  2. Business expansion can be gained through personally engaging in a range of different activities.  We thus interact with a wide range of people.    For example, by playing cricket and getting to know the other cricket players and their supporters, opportunities for new avenues of communication through their networks may be recognised.
  3. A greater connection between personal passions and building networks which can benefit us in the work situations.  For example, where we have an interest or capability, by offering to serve on committees or boards, or taking other leadership roles, we become more ‘visible’, and are also ‘in the know’ regarding developments or other information which could be helpful to us or to others, if appropriate to share.
  4. ‘If you grow yourself, you grow some-one else.’   Within an organisation, if we improve our product, service or the way we operate, we can more easily complete processes, enhance the over-all performance, thus lifting standards for everyone.  Quality conversations play an important part in this.
  5. By having a ‘finger on the pulse’, we can notice issues and problems as they arise and thus solve them more quickly and easily.
  6. By keeping track of people, and knowing about their new positions and developments, we can create opportunities for them, for ourselves and for others.
  7. Willingness to help is reciprocal.  If we have an attitude of ‘what can I do for you?’ others will be influenced by this.  When we need help, others are more likely to notice and offer to help us.
  8. When we are searching for new staff, if we have positive relationships with others, we are more confident in accepting referrals from them.  Thus, gaining the right people for positions in our organisations can become less onerous and the positions are more likely to be filled with ‘the right person for the job’.
  9. As networking involves connecting people with people, people with information and people with opportunities, the more we network, the more likely we are to recognise and be able to optimise opportunities on a larger scale for ourselves and for a wider range of people.  Our networks become broader and broader.
  10. People get to know us, our products and our services.  And we know more about others and their current and changing business needs. Thus we can more easily match our products and services to their actual needs.
  11. Although we all know that networking builds trust and positive relationships, the more we network, the more we are reminded of this and able to recognise and optimise opportunities.
  12. Through networking we are exposed to new ideas which we can transfer to our own situations.  In addition, being able to test our ideas within trusted relationships creates opportunities for us to try new things, take prudent risks.
  13. Networking helps us to set new goals and create focus on what we want to achieve.
  14. Elements of time management are significant.  We get things done a lot faster by knowing who to go to. And this isn’t always the decision-maker at the top.  Sometimes, by having a good relationship with say, the CEO’s personal assistant, we are more likely to get the appointment with the CEO.  
  15. By allowing more time for the important or strategic activities, there is more time available for a work/life balance.  By having more quality time with family, we are able to concentrate on the important things at work and growth is more likely.
  16. Life is more enjoyable when we work with people we know and trust. And this applies in our formal work positions, with our families and in our community engagements, too.
  17.  By guiding others, we develop our own leadership abilities and become recognised for those.  This opens further opportunities for us and for others.
  18. By developing our own potential further, through networking, people begin to perceive us as an expert in a field.  Thus they come to us for advice and this often makes us ‘lift our game’ and we in fact may become that ‘expert’.
  19. We develop our field of influence.  And this can apply at a micro (internal) or macro (external) level.

For more information on our personal networking training programmes or keynotes please contact Brenda on brenda@146.66.90.172 or +27 82 4993311.

Stay connected – enrich each other’s lives

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When strong relationships are in place, it is not necessary to measure gaps between our interactions.  People who are important in our lives should stay intangibly connected and continue to enrich our lives in ways we may not appreciate unless we pause.   I’m reminded of this each month when my newsletter containing a summary of the last few articles is sent to those who have subscribed to my mailing list.  I’m touched by the responses I receive, often from people I may not have spoken to for some time.  These relationships stay alive. 

Let me share an example:  Some months ago, in the Leadership category, I wrote an article about Michael Mathews, an outstanding leader who taught me a great deal about effective leadership.  Recently, after reading my current newsletter he contacted me.  I was delighted when he responded positively, reminding me of the poem ‘Leisure’ by W H Davies.  Reading the poem again now is particularly relevant.   My life has evolved to a point where I’m constantly reminding myself and those whom I coach about the importance of stopping.  Yet, like many others, I am so busy on the treadmill of life that I had not stopped to rekindle that connection to the poem.  So, thank you Michael for reminding me.  

Leisure

What is this life if, full of care,
We have no time to stand and stare.

No time to stand beneath the boughs
And stare as long as sheep or cows.

No time to see, when woods we pass,
Where squirrels hide their nuts in grass.

No time to see, in broad day light,
Streams full of stars, like skies at night.

No time to turn at beauty's glance,
And watch her feet, how they can dance.

No time to wait till her mouth can
Enrich that smile her eyes began.

A poor life this if, full of care,
We have no time to stand and stare.

from Songs Of Joy and Others (1911)

Reading the poem inspired me to find out more about the poet’s colourful life.  From Wikipedia I learnt that as a young man, Davies finished school under a cloud of theft and was considered delinquent.  He spent a significant part of his life as a tramp or hobo, in the United Kingdom and United States, but became one of the most popular poets of his time. The principal themes in his work are observations about life's hardships, the ways in which the human condition is reflected in nature, his own tramping adventures and the various characters he met. Davies is usually considered one of the Georgian poets, although much of his work is atypical of the style and themes adopted by others of the genre. 

W. H. Davies

Davies in 1913, photographed by Alvin Langdon Coburn.

Born:  July 1871, Newport, Monmouthshire, Wales

Died:  26 September 1940 (age 69), Nailsworth, Gloucestershire.

Occupation:  Poet, writer, tramp

Nationality:  Welsh

Period:  1905–1940

Genres:  Lyrical poetry, autobiography

Literary movement:  Georgian poetry

Notable work(s):  The Autobiography of a Super-Tramp, "Leisure"

Spouse(s):  Helen Payne (m. 5 February 1923)

By taking the time to read my newsletter and including the poem in his response, Michael inspired me to ‘take action’ and explore further. 

By responding we let people know that we care. So, take time to stop and absorb what others are saying.  And respond appropriately in a meaningful way.  You’ll enhance your own ‘way of being’ and enrich the lives of others. 

For more information please contact Brenda on brenda@146.66.90.172 or +27 82 4993311.

122: Networking benefits updated

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It is always interesting watching a sense of ‘community’ develop during our six-week ‘Enhance Your Executive Skills’ (‘EYES’)  courses. Friendship and support are important factors in facilitating development. 

In line with their building positive relationships, during our latest course, participants listed the following as their perceived top benefits of networking: 

  • Fast-tracking the introductory process - going from ‘hello’ to quality conversation in a short space of time.
  • Progressing through building relationships to exploring possibilities and meaningful action for mutual benefit.
  • Growing strong and sustainable friendships with like-minded people.
  • Having a sense of connection and belonging.
  • Building trust and respect.
  • Through visibility, gaining influence and reputation.
  • Promoting personal brand and possibly business brand.
  • Building confidence through support and being able to develop and test innovative ideas
  • Improving self-validation.
  • Sharing experiences and appreciation.
  • Listening and learning more about different cultures and diverse groups thus leading to greater understanding.
  • Increasing our frame of reference.
  • Enhancing an attitude of ‘how can I help you to help me help someone else’?
  • Developing more selfless and honest relationships.
  • Understanding ‘internal politics’, power and influence
  • Learning, awareness of trends and access to information.
  • Saving time and money.

‘EYES’ participants, Jacqui Bourne and Melissa Moodley.

For more information on the ‘Enhance Your Executive Skills’ courses which combine training and coaching sessions or Executive Coaching programmes, please contact Brenda Eckstein on +27 82 4993311 or brenda@146.66.90.172

120: Personal Networking Tips

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Personal networking is great fun!  - particularly when our motivating thought is ‘what can I do for you’?  We are all tired of those people whose aim is to ‘make friends’ so that they can sell us their products or services.  We want genuine positive relationships coming from the person’s ‘heart’.  

Networking occurs wherever people gather.  Sometimes we distinguish between a ‘formal’ group, where we have chosen to ‘join’ so that we ‘belong’ and ‘informal’ groups which develop and have a life of their own.  Often those ‘formal’ groups give rise to ‘informal’ clusters.  For example, many of us joined the Pietermaritzburg Chamber of Business specifically to learn and to grow our businesses.  However, it is fascinating how over time, although our common interest remains significant, friendship and support are factors which help bind the members together. 

Within the formal Chamber structure are sub-structures like the new ‘Marketing Mix’ where I was privileged to be the speaker last night.  It was a relatively small group so I adapted and changed my ‘keynote’ into a more interactive workshop.  In the picture below we are role-playing how to gain the greatest networking value out of ‘cocktail’ functions.  (The signs and fancy glasses added to our fun.)

L-R: Lungile Nkabinde, Brenda Eckstein, Alianh Tsoinyane, and Bridget Jones.

I find it sad that so many people avoid social functions simply because they are uncomfortable attending alone.  They miss recognising and optimising opportunities.  How do I go and talk to people?  What will I talk about?  How do I conduct myself? How do I escape if I’m not enjoying myself?  These are social skills that can be learned.  And we cover these in our networking workshops.  But people need to keep practising.   

I also find it important to make participants conscious of the kinds of conversations we have.  In coaching we talk about the sequence of ‘conversation for relationship’, ‘conversation for possibility’ and then ‘conversation for action’.  And in building relationships ‘out there’ in the real world, we also need to establish the relationship as strongly as possible before exploring possibilities and then taking appropriate action. 

Ten tips on personal networking 

  1. Social media connections and other electronic means of communicating are great – but there is no substitute for meeting people ‘face to face’.  One organisation that I was working with recently introduced a new mantra:  ‘Pick up the phone!’  People were sitting at their desks sending e-mails to the person next to them instead of holding conversations.  The leadership realised that personal relationships were dwindling.
  2. Approach networking with an attitude of ‘what can I do for you’? 
  3. Don’t ever give out your business card without first asking permission.  ‘May I give you one of my business cards’?  And the same applies to your advertising material.  At social gatherings or networking events, keep it to yourself and use only at the appropriate time. 
  4. Practise the ’30 second introduction’ which helps to lead to quality conversation.  Please have a look at the previous article, ‘Greetings’.
  5. Practise ‘Quality Conversation’.  The template can be found in our article ‘Building Relationships Through Quality Conversation’. You can practise this every day of your life (unless you are alone on a desert island, in solitary confinement, incapacitated in some other way or voluntarily participating in a ‘silence retreat’.)  I practise with my grandchildren and two of them have become far better than I am. Whenever we are in the car, one will say to me, ‘Granny Brenda, can we please play conversations’?
  6. Regard networking as a process.  What you do before the event, at the event and afterwards are all important in building relationships and sustaining them.  Networking is not a transaction.  Just meeting a person is not ‘networking’ – although it is an important part of the process. 
  7. In order to get the most out of a social event where you will possibly network, it is a good idea to ask for a list of participants in advance.  It is not always possible, but in the case of conferences, for example, it is a tool which is often available.  I go through the attendance list and decide who I really want to meet or ‘connect’ with again. 
  8. Then I find out as much about each participant as possible.  For example, at a recent event, by looking at their website, I found a photo of the person I was hoping to meet.  At the crowded functions, I at least had an idea of what he looked like, was able to identify him and go and speak to him.  Having looked at their corporate website, and knowing some background made conversation easier.
  9. When you meet a person, consciously use as many of your senses as possible to create a more vivid impression of that person.  What do they look like?  Could you describe them to some-one else easily afterwards (even the Police!)?  And if you exchange business cards, look at their card carefully.  Show interest.  And look at the spelling of the name and all the other details.  How tall are they?  Concentrate on the sound of their voice.  Would you recognise them if they phoned?  What perfume or aftershave are you aware of?  When you shook hands, what did their handshake feel like?  These are just some of the questions you could ask.
  10. After the event, contact the person again within 24 hours.  You are helping to cement the memory of meeting you.  That message or phonecall can be as simple as:
  • ‘I enjoyed meeting you at xy function. 
  • Include at least one fact unique to them – so that they feel as though this isn’t just a generic message that you are sending to everyone.  ‘It is interesting that you and Mpumi will be working as associates in the future and I look forward to hearing  more about the latest development.
  • Let’s stay in contact.’  

The definition which I developed over time and use in ‘Networking Tactics’ and ‘ABCs of Effective Networking’ is as follows:

‘Personal Networking’ is an active ongoing process which involves making contacts at a time when we probably don’t need them, organising and updating the relevant information, sustaining contact so that we build positive relationships and when the need arises, if appropriate, drawing on those relationships for mutual advantage.’    

I need to change this definition to incorporate an attitude of ‘what can I do for you’?  What are your suggestions? 

For more information on workshops covering building positive relationships and other aspects of networking, or for details of ‘keynotes’ on these topics, please contact Brenda Eckstein on +27 82 4993311 or brenda@146.66.90.172

103: Networking influence

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Networking is no longer a choice – it is a necessity for success in any business or professional career.  To many successful people, networking ‘comes naturally’.  It is an unconscious activity.  But it is wise for each of us to invest time in reflecting on our unique strengths as networkers.  How can we improve?  What can we offer others?  How good are we at building relationships?  

Unless we have built positive relationships, exploring possibilities is unlikely to be as effective as it could be.  And the successful outcomes of our actions and projects often depend on the first two steps – building relationships and exploring possibilities.

Each year companies spend huge amounts of money on association memberships, functions and hospitality events.  They rely heavily on networking for business generation, as well as for managing relationships with existing clients.  In addition, networking is equally important internally.  Often there is a high correlation between the quality of their networks and the success of ‘high potential’ employees. 

I value the ‘network’ I have built up over the years, both from a business and personal perspective.  And my current relationships reflect various ‘eras’ in my development and different formal and informal groups.  And I continue to have my life enriched by wonderful people.  For example, a fellow ‘executive coach’ in Johannesburg, Pat Roberts recently asked a provocative question of a group when running a session and she shared it with me: “Who in your environment could have the most influence on your career and what are you doing to build your relationship with that person?”  She found that the issues and ideas that emerged from this discussion were amazing. 

Reflect on these questions.  Explore possibilities and then take action.  Often we don’t realise how those in our networks not only enjoy helping us, but also sometimes consider it an honour to do so.  But even more important, what can you do for them?  How can you be of assistance?

There are many books on the topic of networking.  Two that are recommended are:

‘Networking tactics’ (please see above) and ‘ABCs of effective networking’ (also authored by Brenda Eckstein). 

For more information on our ‘Networking Tactics’ workshops, or for a speaker on the topic of networking, please contact Brenda on +27 82 4993311 or +27 33 3425432 – email brenda@146.66.90.172 or www.strategy-leadership.com

Networking Savvy: The faces behind the websites

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This week’s topic ‘Networking Savvy’ forms the ‘launching pad’ of our brand new ‘EYES’ (Enhance Your Executive Skills) course that begins this Thursday, October 11.  This six-week course combines training and coaching.  I’m delighted to be developing this programme immediately after another exciting trip to Australia where I was again able to attend high-value meetings.  One of these was an ICF  (International Coach Federation) meeting in Sydney.  The presenter, Dr Hilary Armstrong of ‘The Institute of Executive Coaching and Leadership’ discussed ‘Executive Coaching in an Increasingly Politicised Workplace’.    She said that leaders, in order to develop ‘political savvy’ need to hone their ‘networking’ and ‘collaboration’ skills!  (Isn’t this ‘music to the ears’!)  These are people skills involving communication and this combination presents interesting challenges to us as coaches. 

Let me give you some background:  Seven years ago when I wrote my first book on personal networking,  ‘Networking Tactics:  a guide to achieving success through personal networking’ and even when the second book, ‘ABCs of effective networking:  fifty-two ways to achieve success’ was published, social media was not a part of our daily lives.  They continue to gain importance.  However, the more we use electronic media for our communications, the more we need to be reminded of the importance of building positive personal relationships. This impacts on our ability to network and collaborate.  And quality conversation is a key factor.

In Sydney I have a wonderful network of family, friends and business associates.  And many of these have websites.  There is power in linking ‘the face behind the website’ with ‘the face of the business’.  By combining technology and our people skills we can generate even more interest and increase understanding.  This also links to ‘corporate branding’ and ‘personal branding.’

As an example I have chosen 7 of the people I enjoy meeting with.  I have given a few lines on each and then given you a link to their websites.  So, have a look at the photos, read what I have said about each and then go to their websites. (So, indirectly, you’ll be networking with them, too!)  You’ll be fascinated by these interesting people and the work they do.  And of course, you are welcome to contact them!  You won’t be disappointed!  That is networking at its best!

 

Gary Eckstein is an excellent example of a person who combines technical expertise and people skills.  His research for his MBA at a top university involved ‘e-marketing’.  As a business consultant, working with a range of clients he helps develop and optimise websites.  (Have a look at my website!) I believe that part of Gary’s success lies in his excellent ability to hold quality conversations. I really enjoy meeting him for coffee – we can talk for hours.   He meets local clients ‘face-to-face’ and being so approachable is part of the success of his business.   

 

 

Rodney Marks is a colourful character who humorously presents relevant and meaningful messages which leave an indelible impression.  A Harvard graduate, he is able to provide a  philosophical, yet seriously funny, approach to any topic.  I have heard him speak on numerous occasions and been enthralled each time.   In addition, he works in conjunction with his two sons.   Benjamin is a comedy-writer and Joshua is a film-maker. A former Past President of the NSW Chapter of NSAA, and also of the national body, he has been awarded various honours for the work he performs. And these have been richly deserved.   One-on-one, Rodney is also an excellent conversationalist.   

 

Kim McGuiness inspires and motivates.  Her monthly ‘Network Central’ breakfasts in the upmarket ‘Tea Room’ in the Queen Victoria Building in Sydney are a resounding success.  Corporate women and business owners throng to be part of these high-powered events.  As the organiser and MC Kim sets the scene in a professional, yet warm and friendly way.  Her speakers shine – because she helps them to do their best!  In addition to the breakfasts in Sydney and Melbourne, there are mentoring programmes that really work, and may other initiatives that she is involved in.   I always enjoy having coffee with Kim, too.  

Dr Jane Goodall with Andrew O’Keeffe
www.hardwiredhumans.com

Andrew O’Keeffe remains a warm and friendly guy who always seems pleased to meet for coffee despite his outstanding success and busy schedule.  It has been exciting watching Andrew climb from (almost) obscurity to his current position as sought-after author and speaker.  His messages are powerful about the implication of our social nature to leadership.  And his link to Dr Jane Goodall and her institute adds even more depth and interest to his work.  He describes ‘Hardwired Humans’ as ‘designing people strategies based on human instincts’.  Well done, Andrew! 

 

Danny Beran certainly is a ‘doctor with a difference’! His entrepreneurial approach and provocative spirit certainly dispel complacency.  Conversations are of a high quality and leave me with lots to think about!

I first met Danny when he was in the process of completing his book:  ‘Ten questions you must answer before you die’. As a coach my work involves conversations and asking the right questions so this was of great interest to me.   His written message made a huge impact and so do our conversations.  His kindness, warmth and caring reflect the essence of his book.  It is a privilege to spend time with Danny.    

 

Jan Sky is a charming, dignified and competent person who inspires confidence.  There is great synergy between the work we do as Jan is also a trainer, coach, author and speaker.  When we met recently for coffee, I was fascinated to hear that she has recently presented in Finland and The Netherlands.  Her book, ‘The Many Parts of You’ (published in English and Finnish) has now been extended to a set of cards.  These are a useful tool used to identify both inhibitive and supportive factors to positive behaviour change, helping teams and individuals to achieve their goals.   

 

Russell Johnson
www.epr.com.au

 

Russell Johnson was referred to me by Thevan Krishna, some-one whose friendship I value highly.  So I met Russell for the first time last week at his office with a stunningly beautiful view in Sydney. Our fascinating conversation lasted over an hour.  I’m intrigued by the way he combines a number of my key focus areas in helping high ranking executives to manage their careers.  His programmes include coaching (to recognise and develop their own potential), personal strategy, leadership and communication skills development and of course, networking.   I’m looking forward to our next conversation!  In the meantime, please visit his website and study the amazing information there.  

Quality conversation is important to me and I’m privileged to have positive relationships with such fascinating individuals.  Visit their websites – you won’t be disappointed!

 

Organising information

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Learning to quickly and easily organise information for written and verbal communication is a skill which benefits everyone.  Our Communication Skills courses enhance that ability and in particular the ‘How to get Your Point Across’ and ‘Presentation Skills’ modules emphasise these skills.  In addition these topics are often incorporated in Leadership Development. 

A good example came from a recent 14-session ‘Communication Skills’ course run ‘in house’ for a group of young engineers.  As an assignment, using the simple formula practised during sessions, they were asked to write a brief article on ‘The Benefits of Networking’.  I have used the example provided by Bisisiwe Ndlovu, metallurgist.

Bisisiwe Ndlovu

Networking is one of the most fundamental things that keep both people and their companies afloat and running. This has been proven to be the main fuel behind a lot of people’s success and that of their businesses.

Networking is most beneficial to businesses and companies. Most companies gain recognition and publicity through the art of networking. Some companies are even recognized internationally through good networking skills. For instance, Hulamin is a well-known producer of semi-fabricated and fabricated aluminum products both nationally and internationally. This was achieved through proper networking skills. 

Networking can also be beneficial to people. It can help them improve their businesses performance, products and staff skills. As well as that, it can help them develop knowledge and skills by providing them with opportunities to market themselves and their products. People also use networking to boost their reputation and to gather new leads. Some even raise their business profile by becoming an established and regular networking member, getting their face and business known.  

The community can also benefit through networking. Most community based organizations are formed through the collaboration of the community with fellow business personnel. In this case networking can be the fertilizer that fosters the development of good relationship between individuals and organizations. Networking can also benefit the community and organizations by assisting them to form organizational partnership, collaborating projects and sharing of services. This in turn results in the reduction in overheads and the sharing of staff.  

In conclusion networking is one of the beneficial tools that can lead people to their goals. All in all, networking leads to success.”

If you would like to know more about courses which would help you to organise information quickly and easily, please contact me brenda@146.66.90.172,  Phone: +27 33 3425432, Mobile: + 27 82 4993311.

Expanding the ‘Cornerstone’ concept

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My personal ‘balance’ philosophy is captured in the acronym FLAG.  And I know this can mean many different things to different people!  I use FLAG to show that there needs to be a combination of Fun, Leadership And Growth in all our endeavours.  In my workshops these four elements form the cornerstones providing the framework within which balance and achievement are possible. And in our business and daily lives this applies, too.  Thus ‘balance’ forms an integral part of my work as an ‘executive coach’, too.

The template used in BEI workshops and ‘executive’ coaching.

In two separate recent ‘leadership development’ and ‘communication skills’ courses, during one of the  twelve four-hour sessions, the participants, working in groups, answered the question, ‘Why is it important to incorporate Fun, Leadership, And (continuous improvement), Growth in order to achieve balance?.  The consolidated input from these two groups was as follows:

Fun

  • Fun energises. 
  • Positive energy and a positive mental attitude go together.
  • Surrounding ourselves with positive people helps us to stay positive, feel good and be happy.
  • Fun brings humour and laughter and this binds people together.
  • This attracts more people who have common interests.
  • Fun helps to get things done because people are more motivated.
  • The working environment is more enjoyable for everyone.
  • This builds staff morale and helps to make this the ‘firm of choice’.  Staff retention improves. 
  • Having fun encourages us to attempt things we may have tried as children and ‘put on the back burner’. Having support helps, too.
  • Fun helps us to look for the lighter side and make the best of every situation.
  • ‘Fun’ needn’t be huge.  Make the little things count in a suitable manner.  Celebrate every step to success.
  • By having fun and being positive we can ‘aim for the highest’ in everything we do.  Thus fun can help to lift our standards.
  • Laughter with friends increases our endorphins, the brain’s ‘feel good’ chemicals.

Fun enhances opportunities to develop strong Leadership and strong teams that continuously improve (A).  This leads to Growth of the Leader, team-members and individuals.  Thus this element impacts on the other three ‘cornerstones’. 

Leadership

  • Leadership, whether we are leading others or practising ‘self-leadership’ is necessary for setting our vision.
  • We serve those whom we lead and we need to ‘lead with’ those whom we are serving.
  • Strong leadership enhances team performance.
  • Leadership provides emotional support and maintains strength within the team
  • It is important to celebrate the individual successes of those whom we are leading.  Give credit for achievements.
  • We need to keep the group energised to achieve the vision and goals we set for them.
  • The whole concept of ‘Ubuntu’ is important.  The interdependence of people means that by improving Leadership for one person there is a ripple effect on all other role-players.
  • As a leader it is important to know our team’s potential and thus recognise and optimise appropriate opportunities.
  • Leaders need to ‘pause’ and reflect in order to optimise performance. 

Strong Leadership enables clearer and more meaningful visions to be set.  The approach of leaders needs to be that of ‘continuous improvement’ (A) of self, the team and individuals. The Fun element energises and aids progress.  Again, the interrelationship of the three facilitates the fourth, Growth.   

And

‘And’ implies ‘something extra’ and we use this to denote ‘continuous improvement’.

  • Reflect on what needs to be improved and take appropriate action.
  • Stay part of the process, avoid distance.
  • Flexibility is important in continuously improving.  Adapt to situations.
  • Complacency causes stagnation and we should guard against that.
  • Continuous improvement of ourselves involves competition with our past performance and possibly with other people.  However collaboration plays a key role. 
  • In order to continuously improve in all areas of our lives, develop awareness.  We need to use our senses more and reflect.
  • It is important to constantly ask ourselves the ‘six wives and a husband’ questions – who, how, when, where, why, what, which?  An ‘attitude of positive discontent’ helps us to find ways of continuously improving.
  • ‘Go the extra mile’ in everything we do.
  • We need to be continuously improving ways that enhances our ‘authentic selves’ rather than fitting the moulds that others build for us.  In other words, ‘live for yourself and not to satisfy others expectations’

Continuous improvement (A) of product, service and the way we operate enhances our performance in all areas of our lives.  This impacts on our Leadership, our ability to build, sustain and spend our energy in a meaningful way (here the F is very important) and leads to Growth.  So, all four elements have impact.

Growth

  • Concentrating on growth will help us to become the ‘person of choice’, ‘team of choice’, ‘organisation of choice’ etc.
  • Growth means identifying the ‘gaps’ and working on ways of closing them.
  • We need to communicate better in order grow as individuals, teams or organisations. 
  • Building strong relationships provides ‘sound bases’ on which to grow further.
  • We need to simultaneously work towards the ‘vision’ and concentrate on our ‘tactics’, the steps necessary to get there.
  • Building the future and maintaining the present are important for real growth to occur.  For example, if we have no vision, we’ll stay where we are.  (No growth).  However, if we don’t ‘maintain the present’ everything will collapse and we won’t ever reach our future vision!
  • In order to see how much we have grown, we need to stop, reflect and look back on the starting point and distance travelled.

Growth is an outcome of continuous improvement (And).  But we need direction and Leadership to co-ordinate our efforts and make our ‘continuous improvement’ part of our journey.  It can’t be ‘granular’.  Without Fun this would all become a tiresome, heavy exercise and there would be little enjoyment and little motivation to continue the journey.  So, Fun is an essential ingredient in our cohesive approach to balance – in whatever we do. 

What are you doing to gain more ‘balance’ in your life?  In a previous post entitled ‘FLAG cornerstones’ on October 26 2011, I provided a brief questionnaire from my first book, ‘Networking tactics’.  These FLAG principles can easily be incorporated in leadership or self-development programmes.  If you would like more information on our training courses or ‘executive coaching’, you are welcome to contact  me - brenda@146.66.90.172,  Phone: +27 33 3425432, Mobile: + 27 82 4993311. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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